A pack of wild animals raced up ahead of me as my legs were collapsing from the thought of having to climb 354 steps. The fresh air was tickling my nostrils, I could feel the butterflies dancing in my stomach. As I got closer to the top, my hands were quivering and my face was hurting from smiling too much. My eyes stood wide as I was only 10 glorious steps away from the top. The wind was whistling as I reached the crown. The sound of cameras clicking and birds tweeting filled my ears. The view was impeccable! I climbed back down to the bottom and by the time I was back on ground level, my legs were like jelly! I looked back up and she was as tall as Mt. Everest. She was royalty to my eyes. The big beautiful brilliant lady stood in front of me. Where am I?
Tuesday, June 12, 2018
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Hi Mckenna. Thanks for sharing your writing. I like how you have used a variety of descriptive words to make your writing exciting. It feels like I am actually watching this story unfold like a movie- show not tell!
ReplyDeleteA suggestion for next time is to try and use different words to start your sentences. eg instead of The fresh.... just start with Fresh.